Sunday, January 1, 2012

January 1, 2012. Blip Journal; the progress of a NYC writer @bezotes

"Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.”

Odilia Rivera Santos

December 31, 2011 was a strange day in New York City. It was too warm for winter; people ran by in shorts and tank tops, kids skateboarded noisily around potholes and the city was swarming with New-Year's-Eve-Time-Square tourists. There was a steady stream of text messages on my Blackberry from all sorts of interesting characters I met in 2011 in addition to old friends. Because I have the bad habit of not putting in phone numbers immediately, I found myself saying Happy Happy New Year! or ¡Feliz Año! without knowing to whom I was sending texts, thinking if it was a mistaken text, wishing a stranger well would be a good way to start the new year.

Prayer is asking a question and meditation is waiting for an answer - anonymous, I think

I pray often, but mine is a nondenominational God who accepts whatever mode of communication I choose and is tranquil and forgiving. I have been a Buddhist for a long time and chose to not intellectualize Buddhism in the least. Perhaps, someday, I will be inclined to write about the spiritual transformation that led me to Buddhism, but I doubt it.

The day before the first day of 2012
I spent most of the day writing or meditating because, for me, the end of the year is always a time to reflect and think of ways to be a better person, businessperson, friend, partner, sister, writer, etc.

While a lot of people focus on the clutter in their homes, I considered the clutter of information in my life. This was the main reason for choosing to read once per week; it was difficult at first, but I quickly grew accustomed to not collecting new words and concepts from other writers, and my writing is proceeding more quickly. There is also an odd sense of maturity that came over me -- why live like you're cramming for an exam?

This morning, I finished a new monologue for In and Out of Character, Women Speak, which is my way of connecting with actors without the headaches of having everyone coordinate schedules. Three actors will perform my monologues and when the time is right, my plays will be onstage. Last year, I spent a tremendous amount of money and time trying to get my play Las hermanas coraje did and it was a great expensive lesson. I had so many struggles as a child and came from such a difficult background I forget it isn't necessary for me to choose the hardest way to get things done, so I am done with that remnant from the past. Being determined is my connection to the divine and being stubborn is a fear-based act borne of childhood suffering.
The road of least resistance flanked by rows of lavender is the one on which I will proceed in my personal life -- both in the romantic and platonic realms and in my professional life.

Dead and buried in 2011
I set up a metaphorical casket on a metaphorical shrine and placed some items I decided to bury for real
- trying to convince people of anything
- taking phone calls from people who I do not want to talk to
- calling people who've told me they hate talking on the phone
- volunteer work
- fear-based acts borne of childhood suffering
- stubbornness

"Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.”

My world is here and I gladly give my heart to it.

I hope to see you here. in January for my show.
Performances by Jani Rose Rosado:

China Letish Colston

Aime Alonzo

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